Tryyying to undress. This was back in june 2009. I havent done much about my cultural body shame since. Other than sending a small portfolio of these photos from the “ayip-series” for a few group exhibitions and then really forgetting about it as life was taking up too much of my time. Life (read: health!).

A side comment/side conclusion to my thesis on ayip-shame:
It is maybe naive to think that art can emancipate women and female artists from the “institutionalized ayip” of Turkey.
I would like to emphasize that it is really an individual journey/proces to be able to overcome ayip-shame. As in the cases of my 4 interviewees it becomes clear that none of them are completely freed from the ayip-structures as they are all in a negotiable position in regards to ayip in all their relations.
Although one thing is quite obvious, the fact that all 4 interviewees are on a certain path in life, although originating from social classes that do not necessarily see art as a place or position to earn money..they have all had specific opportunities in their lives along with inner strenght and a strong will power.
It is therefore obvious that a female emancipation and thus an overcoming of ayip can only be realized by each individual female.
this emancipation is also depending very much on class and privileges as mentioned earlier.
Ergo art cannot in my opinion emancipate all women in TR. But together with feminism, politics, activism and a far away opportunity of having a sexual revolution in Turkey maybe make a difference to that one woman/female artist and the women and girls and children and local community around them.
This leads me to an even newer area of being/becoming a pioneer as a woman in one’s own society. Being the first to study art, being one of the first to enter academia,being the first to articulate and live against the norm in one’s society,being the first to becoem a teacher, being the first who moved out of her parents’ house to go and live and study in a dorm, being the first to get a divorce, being the first to run away from home..etc.etc.etc.
and life becomes this place where you are always misplaced in the place you grew up, always feeling different and strange. This was not just the Turkish village culture that I belonged to, this was as much the Danish village mentality that one was part of. And life continues to be an arena where one struggles to become oneself without being ashamed to be different (and God forbid it clever and creative!), spending all their wake hours explaining people what you are doing in life as its not just the majority of Turks wanting/needing an explanation, but also the Danes as theory, critical thinking and interdisciplinarity is too new for them!